Interpersonal Communication Assignment 3

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Objective: The application papers are designed to allow you to demonstrate your application of concepts
and/or theories to your everyday life. Specifically, it is your chance to make the course relevant to you! In
order to show that you have applied concepts correctly to everyday experiences, you should make sure to
define/explain concepts that you refer to and specifically indicate how aspects of the concept/theory relate to
the advice you provide.
Format: The assignment must fit on the front of a single sheet of paper!! Each paper must be typed,
single-spaced, and in APA format (6th ed.). You should provide a list of references at the bottom of the page
(APA style format) for all information referenced. Each application assignment is worth 6.67 points.
CONFLICT AND RELATIONAL TRANSGRESSIONS
This section of the course deals with conflict and relational transgressions (i.e., conflict, hurtful messages,
infidelity, jealousy, obsessive relational intrusion, intimate partner violence, and relational repair and
forgiveness). Below are a series of advice column questions. Please select one (1) of the following questions
to address in a one-page response. Please be sure to identify the question you are answering in your written
response.
Question #1 (Applicable Concepts: Conflict, Intimate Partner Violence, Relational Repair)
I was dating this guy for the past six months and he decided to drop the breakup bomb in the middle of a
dinner date. We were at a restaurant and I really felt blindsided. I was so upset that he didn’t deliver the news
in a more thoughtful, intimate, and sensitive manner. He didn’t give any real reason other than something
like “I think it’s best we both move on.” He was also very cold and businesslike in how he presented it. It
almost felt like I was on an exit interview after getting let go by a company. My emotions got the best of me
and I really lost control. I gave him a stinging slap across the face that was widely noticed and then walked
out. It was in the city so I took a cab home. While I’m still resentful of how he handled it, I feel like I should
do the mature and responsible thing and apologize for the slap. I don’t really feel like calling him so would
an apology note via email or regular mail be appropriate?
Question #2 (Applicable Concepts: Jealousy)
I’m jealous. I’m jealous of people who succeed at what I do (write literary fiction). I’m jealous of them even
if I love them or like them or respect them. Even when I pretend to be happy when my writer friends get
good news, the truth is I feel like I swallowed a spoonful of battery acid. For days afterwards I go around
feeling queasy and sad, silently thinking why not me? Where is this jealousy coming from and how can I deal
with it?
Question #3 (Applicable Concepts: Obsessive Relational Intrusion/Stalking)
I am 25 and my friend, “John,” is 33. I’ve known John since I was 8 years old. He was my brother’s best
friend growing up and was considered a family friend. After going through a pretty tough time in his earlymid
20s, John began to visit my family at least once a week and would stay for a few hours to talk. Often, it
was just John and I at home when he came over as my brother no longer lived at home and my parents
worked late. Recently he actually started showing up at my house more often — two or three times a week.
I’ve now told him I’d prefer he ask my permission if he wants to come over. But after my saying this to him,
he seems to want more contact. He now calls me a couple of times a week, as well as asking to see me
throughout the week. It’s exhausting. He will sulk or get emotional if I tell him I can’t talk or that I am busy.
Last week when I said I didn’t feel like visitors, he called me trying to persuade me to let him come over.
Please help! What should I do to make him understand that this is not ok?
Question #4 (Applicable Concepts: Infidelity, Intimate Partner Violence, Forgiveness)
I am a mother of three, married for fourteen years. I was under the mistaken impression that my marriage
was intact. I recently found out my husband is having an affair. I’ve sensed something was wrong for a long
time, even though he denied it. He hasn’t been involved in our lives (mine or the kids’) for years—he is a
workaholic, and we have been an afterthought. This has made me admittedly depressed, and I’ve turned into
my own worst nightmare—“the nagging wife.” Last week, I found irrefutable evidence that he is cheating on
me. In some ways it was a relief to know the truth, but when I confronted him, he became enraged and
grabbed me so hard I still have bruises. He has never done anything like this before. A neighbor heard the
commotion and called the police. Once the police came, he admitted what he’d done and was apologetic and
begged for my forgiveness. This whole situation has gotten out of hand. What should I do?

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